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Financial Feelings

September 25th, 2007 at 11:16 pm

When it comes to spending money, I don't seem to have too much trouble denying things for myself, but have much more difficulty in denying things to my wife or children. I can say, "We can't afford it" occasionally, but either guilt, frustration, or fatigue usually get to me eventually and I cave. For instance, I currently drive a 1995 Ford sedan with over 154,000 miles on it and no debt attached. My wife drives a much newer Honda CRV which she still owes about $5,000 on. She wants to get a larger vehicle. I suggested we wait until her car is paid off, a little over a year. She seemed ok with that, but I know the thought will come up again in a month or two. Each time I suggest holding off, I feel a bit more guilt.

When my oldest daughter was entering the sixth grade she took an entrance exam for a private school. She was accepted into the school. At the time she applied, I didn't know exactly how expensive the school was. Once I found out, I ran the numbers and told my wife that we really couldn't afford it. Obviously, I should have researched things more ahead of time. To make a long story short, my daughter graduated from the school last year. The cost to me for 7 years of middle and high school was over $70,000. Her mom and I have also been divorced for about 5 years now.

For some reason I can't seem to be happy if I spend money or if I don't spend money. Maybe it's my Catholic upbringing to have to feel guilty or I'm not doing something right.

3 Responses to “Financial Feelings”

  1. boomeyers Says:
    1190778802

    Hee hee! Love that Catholic guilt! I let my family run all over me for "things" too.

  2. fern Says:
    1190816311

    Well, it's interesting you brought the Catholic thing up. As i was reading your post, i was going to suggest you think about this more, about why you felt guilty saying 'no' to your wife. I dont' think you should have felt guilty. A marriage is a partnership (this coming from a single person) and financial decisions, in an ideal world, should be discussed and made jointly.

    And personally, i would be horrified to spend $70K on a private school when i really don't think the quality of the education is that much better, one reason being that as i understand, most private schools don't require teachers to be state-certified, as public schools do. (This subject has been discussed before on this forum.)

    Anywy, i noticed this is your 1st post, so WELCOME to the forum. Hope you hang around.

  3. Broken Arrow Says:
    1191454708

    Yeowch. You sound like someone I once knew. ME! Big Grin

    Welcome to the board.

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